August 2011
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When the nurse says she’s going to give you a shot in your hip, what she really means is that she’s going to give you a shot in your ass.
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Tacos for Dinner
MOM: Tacos or meat loaf for dinner?
ME: Tacos
MOM: Bring your appetite. When will you be home?
MOM: Eta?
MOM: ???
ME: Can you pick me up at 6:45? My phone is going to die.
MOM: Walnut St?
ME: Yes
MOM: How many tacos?
ME: Might be more like 7.
MOM: Tacos?
ME: No, my train gets in then.
ME: Tacos? 2?
MOM: How many tacos?
ME: Mom, chill with the tacos.
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